So I know I haven’t blogged for a long time but this topic is really important to me so I will be hijacking my fibromyalgia blog for this short time.
Recently a group of parents have been urging the government to make bullying against the law.
I am completely for this as I was bullied ever since my first day at secondary school.
Here’s a little background about my experiences: I have naturally ginger hair, pale skin, average height and quite thin. Throughout school I had the obvious name calling associated with my hair colour, I also got called names about being underweight and once even got told to “go out and get cancer” in reference to my pale skin. All of these ended up in me becoming very depressed and developing something called body dysmorphic disorder. The lowest point of the bullying was when someone set my hair on fire. I have been lucky to leave the bullying without any physical scars but emotionally I still deal with a lot.
I now have a son and I am terrified that he would ever have to feel how I did in school. Then I think about how parents must feel who have lost their child to suicide after bullying has had such a big effect on them.
That may explain why I am so for bullying being illegal.
Here’s what I think. There are the little name callings that’s just ‘banter’ that can be upsetting but most people will stop when they find out the joke isn’t taken from both sides. Then there’s the bullying that seems to increase exponentially the more you fight it. People who feed off others hurt and it ends up in the horror that is suicide. How is beating someone emotionally any different to beating someone with a crowbar?
It’s illegal to commit actual or grievous bodily harm so why is it not illegal to commit actual or grievous mental harm?
When someone kills another person when they just meant to hurt them a bit, they are committing manslaughter which is illegal. So how is it not the same if someone commits suicide because of someone wanting to hurt them a bit?
The biggest issue is the grey area. Do you prosecute a child for calling someone a name once? Do you prosecute when the school or parents haven’t attempted to fix anything? These are my suggestions to the government, make bullying illegal. When going ahead with legal proceedings parents and schools should keep a log of what attempts have been made to stop the bullying as that is part of teaching children what is right and wrong. If bullying has reached that next stage an has gone too far (which is before self-harm or suicide!), then the law is there to provide consequences.
Basic human psychology: without consequences we can’t learn what’s right or wrong. From a girl’s point of view; eat chocolate and don’t get fat means you can eat more chocolate.
I hope this has made some sense and not just been a rant. Let’s all stop bullying!
Hey so I haven’t posted to my blog for a really long time. The pregnancy towards the end made me extremely tired so if I wasn’t working I was in bed pretty much.
I left work for maternity leave on the 11th of Jan and on the 20th I had my lovely baby boy :). We had to stay in hospital for 3 days as he was a little poorly but, 7 weeks later and we are enjoying our days around the flat and going out for walks to the shop or gp.
Seeing as this blog is about my life suffering from Fibromyalgia, I guess I should tell you how it’s been as a new mum.
Literally as soon as the epidural wore off the fibromyalgia symptoms flooded back. It was as if 9 months of it being fairly manageable hit me all at once. I was in a wheelchair whenever I need to go anywhere from half 5 in the evening till 4am.
Since leaving the hospital I’ve gone back to my normal ratio of good and bad days. I generally always have an ache in my lower back. On good days I can do everything I need to in a day but will be pretty tired by about 7pm. On a bad day though. I can barely even get up let alone pick up my little fussing baby. So far I’ve managed to go through the pain and give what my baby needs but I am definitely worried that I’m coming up to the wall of my strength. I’m currently not taking anything other than paracetamol as I’m breastfeeding. I’m hoping my new gp can help me find some way of coping.
I’m certainly enjoying playing with my boy as much as I can on my good days to make up for being a lousy mum on my bad days.
Hey so I’m now beyond 35 weeks and have been having a few days where I’ve been getting regular contractions.
No sign of waters breaking or any other baby time related signs but I think he’s getting ready to say hello to the world.
So since my last update I’ve had an eventful time. We had worries that I had developed preeclampsia a few days ago so went to see my GP. No preeclampsia luckily, but we did find out that I have developed gestational diabetes. As I’m so late in the pregnancy they’ve decided to just keep monitoring me rather than induce me early. So now I’m on weekly check ups at the hospital.
What does this mean in terms of my lifestyle?
Well this is yet another blow to my diet. Now I have different dietary restrictions for the following:
- mild wheat intolerance
- mild lactose intolerance
- allergies to herbs and spices such as oregano, chilli, curry powder, black pepper, bell peppers etc
- high cholesterol
- fibromyalgia and ibs
Needless to say, my first lunch break since being told what I can no longer eat there was many tears whilst staring at the shelves of waitrose.
I have huge empathy for those who have diabetes, at least with gestational diabetes I should be able to go back to eating relatively normally after I’ve had the baby, and that’s what I’m focusing on right now.
The pains are definitely reaching a limit now. Not being able to take the pain killers I had before I was pregnant is testing my mental strength. Currently the fibro seems to be not so bad, it’s only worsened by the weight of my baby and other general pregnancy stuff. The pains I’m getting are focused in my back and hips with my normal aches of my wrists and knees not affecting me so much lately. The worst ache has been in the left side of my back as I have it constantly, whether I’m sitting, lying, standing, stretching etc. Nothing seems to make it go away. I have no idea whether it’s the pregnancy or the fibro but I cannot wait to have this baby and get my body back.
It will be all worth it in the end.
So it’s been a long time since I posted an update, sorry for that!
I’m now almost 32 weeks and been having a lot of pregnancy/fibro issues.
We discovered that my chest pain and heart problems were due to being anemic and the doctor possibly thinks the fibro may have played a role.
I have ballooned since my last update and with that the aches and pains have got worse. Both pregnancy and fibromyalgia.
I certainly am getting tired a lot more, I only had really a month and a bit of energy instead of the full second trimester most women apparently get. I have no idea whether this is just the pregnancy differing as it does from woman to woman, or if it’s the fibro talking my energy.
Other than the expected issues, I’m doing alright! Work is incredibly supportive and I’ve been needing a lot more breaks recently. Yesterday was the baby shower and I was so incredibly overwhelmed by all the love and gifts from everyone. We’re now set for this baby boy! In two weeks we have our antenatal class at the hospital so hopefully that will get us mentally as ready as we are physically.
I go on maternity leave in 7 weeks, lets hope I last at work that long!
If you have any questions about being pregnant whilst suffering form fibromyalgia, feel free to message me.
21 weeks and 4 days….healthy and well developed baby boy :)
It’s been a fair while since I posted an update so this could turn into a long one…
Since my last post at almost 15 weeks I have moved out of my flat into my boyfriends parents. Although cramped fitting all 4 of us under one roof it is quite nice and I have got to know his parents a lot more since they got back from holiday. We have found our perfect flat and are currently waiting on referencing but hopefully will be moved in by next week :).
I’m now 20 weeks pregnant and yesterday we found out we’re having a boy! Quite excited as I think that’s what we both wanted for our first baby but I’m also terrified as I have no idea how to bring up a boy so I have some learning to do. We have everything already sorted for the baby except clothes and toys so now we can get cracking with those.
The pregnancy has been tough, I had a really bad weekend with severe fibromyalgia problems which led to me being unable to really move for about 3 days. My aching has come back and as my bump gets bigger my right hip and knee cope less. It’s definitely worse in the evenings and as much as I’m trying to avoid medicines I’m taking paracetamol almost daily and finding it’s not working all that well. It is interesting to try an guess what will wake me up through the night, needing a wee or my pain.
Anyway that’s enough of an update for now, I should have a new pic of the baby in a couple of weeks :)
So I’ve had a tough ol’ time recently, thought that I would do a bit of an update about it…
I’m now in my second trimester, 14 weeks and 4 days to be exact right now.
And it seems my body is coping less and less each week. I had to go to hospital again last Thursday as my heart started racing and would not go slower no matter what I tried. Luckily nothing majorly wrong with me or baby, the doctor just told me I need to take it a lot easier than I have been and not get stressed cause my heart is struggling with the pregnancy. I have a consultant appointment next week for my 16 week check-up due to my heart issues and the fibromyalgia. This is where the consultant will decide if I’m a high-risk pregnancy and whether I can have my water birth or if I have to give birth on the labour ward. Keep your fingers crossed for me!
So for those who wana know what it’s like to be pregnant with fibro….here’s the lowdown since my last post…
Hello aches and pains! So the last time I posted I said how the aches hadn’t been that bad fibrowise…well that’s all changed. In the past few weeks I’ve experienced aches in my lower back, neck, ankles, hips, knees, elbows and fingers.
Fibrofog or pregnancy brain? I’m not just forgetting things, but my words are getting muddled. I find it hard to say a sentence the right way round - this is definitely the fibro and pregnancy working together
Fatigue much…I am still so tired all the time! I’m meant to be getting my energy back around now but I’m feeling more and more tired. No matter what time I go to bed I feel exhausted when I wake up, more than I was feeling with just the fibro. I’m trying to get a nap when I can but working full time and having to organise moving flat and all the other baby stuff I don’t have much time left to rest. On top of that when I do get to rest the aches are making me so uncomfortable that I then wake up from the pain and have to move around before I can rest again.
OK whinging over, happy thoughts….Should be able to feel the baby move soon and there’ll be a new scan pic in 5 and half weeks!
12 week scan. Baby is very healthy so we are extremely happy.
The fibromyalgia has actually not been as bad as it was before I got pregnant, maybe this is the cure?! I’ve been getting general aches still but not the debilitating ones I had been getting the months prior. My energy levels have been incredibly low. With fibro I’ve always been pretty tired but add in the hormones from pregnancy and I’ve been sleeping every chance I’ve had.. Not fallen asleep at work yet though!
So today marks 10 weeks into my pregnancy….There’s so many things that I knew happened in pregnancy but I didn’t know they happened this early on!!
For example, I’m so out of breath all the time it’s getting annoying. I walk upstairs and I need to rest - part of that is the fibromyalgia, but it’s definitely noticeably getting worse.
My body is changing every day and I already can’t fit into most of my jeans, I’ve just bought new bra’s and already they’re feeling too tight!
All in all the body stuff I can cope with, I have flu at the moment which is a bit of a struggle seeing as I’m asthmatic, the aches are making the fibro worse and I can’t take anything for it because it could harm baby.
What I’m not coping so well with is this huge feeling of being unprepared. I feel like I have nothing sorted, but I don’t know what I need to sort out!
There’s things like my boyfriend and I are going to move in together, but I need to find someone to take my current room before we can know when we can move. I suppose I’m not crazily freaking out about this cause we’ve decided to move by September in time for the third trimester….but I still don’t know where to begin with this.
Maternity clothes - well they’re just god awful! There is not a single maternity shop that sells clothes I like. So far I think my plan is to buy some cheap clothes a couple of sizes too big and then create some ruched sides myself.
On top of all that….this is a baby! I don’t know how my body is going to cope over the next few months, and after all that I have delivery, and then a little baby that needs me!
I’m pretty scared at the moment as there’s not much info out there, that I can find, about pregnancy and fibromyalgia. The normal pregnancy fears I can learn to deal with, but with the fibro I just have to take each day as it comes….
Check back in a couple of weeks when I should have a scan pic to show you :)
Today is the first day since finding out I’m pregnant that I’ve felt really awful with the fibro too.
I can’t tell what symptoms are the pregnancy and what are the fibro?!!
I’m so tired that I swear I’ve fallen asleep with my eyes open a few times today already. I can’t stand for more than 10 minutes or my knees, hips and tummy start aching severely.
To top it all off I have a huge case of fibrofog so in general I’m coming across a little weird to those around me.
It alao doesn’t help that I am in a foul mood…this could be hormones, lack of sleep or that fact that I was so wound up by a manager yesterday that I really don’t want to have to work.
All in all I’m not feeling great. At least tomorrow some decisions can be made as I find out how far I am at my first scan.